Haiz woke up at 7 plus today in the morning but woke up at first to a very bored saturday. It kept raining and raining the whole day. And i was suppose to meet ameerul today in the afternoon but in the last minute he canceled shit him cancel last minute. Sheesh hate changing my plan.

Mum and dad went to tech whye for a while then they got home suddenly ask me change then go for an early dinner at mad jack at bukit timah... Ate my heart out atte a grill chicken with black pepper sauce. Quite nice but swensen still win and top in my list hahaz. Gonna eat swensen one day if got enough money.

Well that is abored saturday changing into a good saturday.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HOLIDAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FOR 5 WEEKSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!

YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hahax have 5 weeks to enjoy yeah2 finally holidays...

work and hang out is my plan for 5 coming weeks hahaz.

gonna mish the guys at school haiz well after 5 weeks gonna meet them and have more fun hahaz. Gonna meet hakim during the holidays he's been gone for 1 month haiz. Me and ameerul are gonna search for him and we work the same days during the holidays because on the we aren't working gonna enjoy our day hahaz. Well thats all for today.. Gonna find sumthing to do to entertain myself hmm gonna play pokemon on my fon which is damn spoil haiz...

Weeee hahaz...back to myself once more. mish the happy me weee... no more worries for me koz the holiday is a day way for me and 5 weeks of work and enjoyment. Been plannig 4 days per work of work to earn a lot of money to buy my things and a new hp. hahaz this damn hp i spoil with all the buttons haiz. Wanna push the buttons???hmm thats wrong hahaz. Well meet my old time fwen today danial.. He just live the next blk but i never see him for quite a while. We go way back since primary 1 and finally got his number hahz gonna contact him went i'm free hahaz k then thats all!!!

It started on 23 feb and ended on 26 may. It been a long journey been with u. We went through thick and thin together. Those memories will stay in my heart and mind. It won't be gone. I'm sorry for what i did to u that day. That is the time i won't forget. I can't control myself when i'm like that. I'm really really regret what i did to u. I noe it happens and i can't turn back time to what it is before. I wish i could. I hope u will be fine. Well i noe it hurts alot. Well i'm trying to find myself slowly. There are people trying to help me get back to the way i am but eventually i will fail myself. thanks alot people. U help lots. Everyday past i will remember what we gone through. This coming days won't be the same for me anymore...

This song i dedicate it to u...



[Verse 1]

I never felt nothing in the world like this before, (no)
Now I'm missing you and I'm wishing you would come back through my door. (yeah, oooh)
Why did you have to go? (go)
You could have let me know, (know)
So now I'm all alone. (ouuuu)
Girl, you could have stayed
But you wouldnt give me a chance.
With you not around, it's a little bit more than I can stand. (ooooh)
And all my tears they
Keep running down my face. (face)
Why did you turn away?

[Bridge]

So why does your pride make you run and hide?
Are you that afraid of me?
But I know it's a lie what you keep inside,
This is not how you want it to be.

[Chorus]

So, baby, I will wait for you.
'Cause I don't know what else I can do.
Don't tell me I ran out of time.
If it takes the rest of my life,

Baby, I will wait for you.
If you think I'm fine, it just aint true.
I really need you in my life.
No matter what I have to do, I'll wait for you.

[Verse 2]

It's been a long time since you called me.
(How could you forget about me?)
You gotta be feeling crazy. (crazy) Ooooh.
How can you walk away? (away)
Everything stays the same, (the same)
I just can't do it, baby. (nooo)
What will it take to make you come back? (ohhh)
Girl, I told you what it is and it just ain't like that. (nono)
Why can't you look at me? (me)
You're still in love with me. (me)
Don't leave me crying.

[Bridge]

Baby, why can't we just-- just start over again?
Get it back to the way it was.
If you give me a chance, I can love you right.
But you're telling me it won't be enough.

[Chorus]

So, baby, I will wait for you.
'Cause I don't know what else I can do.
Don't tell me I ran out of time.
If it takes the rest of my life,

Baby, I will wait for you.
If you think I'm fine, it just ain't true.
I really need you in my life,
No matter what I have to do, I'll wait for you.

[Bridge]

So why does your pride make you run and hide?
Are you that afraid of me?
But I know it's a lie what you're keeping inside.
That is not how you want it to be.

Baby, I will wait for you.
(for you) Oooooh.
Baby, I will wait for you.
If it's the last thing I do,

[Chorus]

Baby, I will wait for you,
'Cause I don't know what else I can do.
Don't tell me I ran out of time.
If it takes the rest of my life,

Baby, I will wait for you.
If you think I'm fine, it just ain't true.
I really need you in my life,
No matter what I have to do, I'll wait for you.

I'll be waiting.

Wee today enjoyed working. Don't know why but i was so happy at work today that i kept disturbing others. hahaz. Founded out that zul was once the same school as me but he quited sometime last year. Same course same school and ended up meeting at the work place hmm thats odd. That is why his face is somehow familiar hmm good good but he is formerly in the class which most of my classmates hate haiz what to do right. Ouh well...

Meet my working sis today weee!!! Been a month plus since saw her working. everytime i work she took off and went i am off she came to work haiz. She change abit. Cut her hair short and started wearing contact lenses now. Why do the people i know started wearing contacts ahhhh!!! my turn is next month i want it so bad so not specs for me hahaz!!!

helo peeps!!! hahaz. Woke up at 6.30am today wah so early ehk. Got a reason why. Went to pasir ris park today for my exercise day. Damn tired. Went to stop at the normal bus stop then warm up myslef by walking slowly for 15 mins to the bicycle shop.

Ended up paying 5 bucks for 1 hour but it was not wasted at all. Managed to sweat out some calories so lesser fat for me hahaz. Must be ready for my n.s before anything happens. Exercising is in my blood now. Must have a daily routine nowadays. Can't be lazy at all. So for my school holidays coming up it is work, hang out and exercise for me. And some revision for school can't forget school at all okies. Well gonna rest now very tired haiz okies then!!!byes!!!

Ahh finally back from school. Today finish school at 4.30 then went to meet ameerul my bro. We went hanging out at our usual place today. K skip all that k. Went we were sitting at the void deck came a really cute kitten. It's color was dark grey with stripes. It was so playful that it kept climbing,scratching, biting and jumping there and here. Haiz so nice to play with a cat once in while. We sat there for 40 mins because an auntie came joining us telling us about cats and telling us that she likes cats. Hmm so nice the auntie came and gave the kitten some food as it look so hungry haiz. Well otw home today i saw a couple hiding from something. In my mind was only one thing and it is correct. They wanted to do a kiss good bye but went they saw me walking they walk away to another spot and there i saw them again but now they are kissing mouth to mouth. AWWWW so sweet a nice kiss goodbye. Hmmm well tats all for today. :-)

Haiz i'm lost in my own world now.

Stress outz with everything happening.

But this song always calms my down..

please listen with the lyrics..



Waiting for your call, I'm sick, call I'm angry
Call I'm desperate for your voice
Listening to the song we used to sing
In the car, do you remember
Butterfly, Early Summer
It's playing on repeat, Just like when we would meet
Like when we would meet

Cause I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight

Stripped and pollished, I am new, I am fresh
I am feeling so ambitious, you and me, flesh to flesh
Cause every breath that you will take
When you are sitting next to me
Will bring life into my deepest hopes, What's your fantasy?
(What's your, what's your...)

Cause I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight

And I'm tired of being all alone, and this solitary moment makes me want to come back home
[X4]
(I know everything you wanted isn't anything you have)

Cause I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight

Cause I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight
(I know everything you wanted isn't anything you have)

well today school was nothing to me. Came as usual early but didn't learn anithing new today. Because school is ending in a another week so the teacher just gave us revision work and some test before the holidays but the worst part is the weather.

It is freaking hot am i'm sweating like hell. I could become one hot stuff if i'm hot hahax. Lame joke ok fine shut up!!! Hahaz Fuck la i'm freaking bored just talking crap to myself haiz. Entertaining myself weeee. Got home 3.45 today. Thought of showering once more but thought back nah better shower in the evening more better right. Gonna get a cold shower and cool myself down. My body is all sticky and i hate it hahaz. Well gonna go thats for today weeeee.

Well back here hahaz. Today came school early but the teacher came late today good good hahaz. Well i did my practical work today and i finish it. The first lesson ended at 11 because there is a concert for the cyclone which happen in Myanmar . The concert consist of some singing and dancing. I donated 20 cents weee. I'm so nice. Then in the afternoon went to pasir ris to meet my love. Heard that she is sad about her exam so i came to comfort her and to make her happy wee. Love don't sad sad anymore okies i'm here always for u my dear muaacks i love u!!! Well on the way back saw a minah tudung with her boi but the funny thing is she is wearing a tudung but she is also hugging her guy in public somemore in the train. Haiz what to do. Hahaz.
-

Yeah yeah finally got blog somemore weee. Koz of this damn monitor suddenly became spoil can't turn it on at all. But now with a new and better monitor i could blog as normal wee hahaaaz. But this new monitor is big and wide and i'm small. Lyke wth right hahaz.

Well today just sat at home. In the mid morning went to jurong point wit mummy and daddy to popular to check out the prices of monitor but they were expensive so we went to the banquet and ate our normal chicken rice. After a few minutes of thinking we finally wnet to harvey norman.

But after tat they went to expo but i didn't follow so just got home alone haiz nevermind then. It's normal for me. Well that's all for now till next tyme weee!!!

yeah got a new skin for my bloggy. Found it just now afternoon. Today school was lyke shit. Went running for 3 rounds with perspiring lyke hell then went to gym to lift up some weights. Haiz really push myself to the limit.

Shit hope tomorrow morning when i woke up in the morning my body wouldn't have cram all over. If not gonna suffer lyke hell.

At class never learn anything new. just sleep in class while hearing my emo songs. Came up with an excuse just to get out from work koz being lazy to work. But did not sit at home at all just went walking around jurong west with ayul!!!weee.... being a long time since meet him. share many stories. He thought me how to jumpstart but still can't get it at all koz can't get the rhythm at all shit. Hear his new stories bout his new friend. He is so so happy and i'm happy for him. Thanks bro hahaz. Finally went home at 8. Well till next tyme then

While in class today was freaking bored. when to my fon and search songs which have a long time not been hearing.

came upon the song on the time is was emo. this are the two songs.



the song promise lyrics

what would you say if i asked you not to go
to forget everyone, forget everything and start over with me
would you take my hand and never let me go
promise me you'll never let me go

and the stars aren't out tonight,
but neither are we to look up at them
why does hello feel like goodbye?
these memories they can't replace,
these wishes i wished and these dreams i chased
take this broken heart and make it right

i feel like i've lost everything when you're gone
left remembering what it's like to have you here with me
i thought you should know,
you're not making this easy

i never thought i'd be the one to say
please don't, well please don't leave me

i feel like i lost everything when you're gone
left remembering what it's like to have you here with me
i thought you should know,
you're not making this easy

you're not making this easy (easy, easy, easy...)

take my hand and never let me go,
take my hand and never let me go,
promise me...
you'll never let go
you'll never let go
you'll never let go
you'll never let go
make this last forever

i feel like i lost everything when you're gone
left remembering what it's like to have you here with me
i thought you should know, you're not making this easy

you're not making this easy
you're not making this easy
you're not making this easy
you're not making this easy

i'll fall asleep tonight, 'cause that brings me closer to you






the songs your stories,my alibis lyrics

speak to me
tell me something so typical
a lullaby or something miserable
that will keep me up at night

cross out my eyes
I know you planned it
you know I love you
and I can't stand it
we just lost control
we just lost control

lie to me
give me something worth living for
tell me a reason worth fighting for
give me anything
anything to keep me breathing
lie to me
give me something worth living for
tell me a reason worth fighthing for (fighting for)
give me anything (anything)
anything to keep me breathing

lie to me
tell me a story so beautiful
an epic of something so terrible
that it makes me weep

cross out these days on your calendar
it hurts me so much
and I'm not quite sure
I care anymore
I care anymore

lie to me
give me something worth living for
tell me a reason worth fighting for
give me anything
anything to keep me breathing
lie to me
give me something worth living for
tell me a reason worth dying for (dying for)
give me anything (anything)
anything to keep me breathing

(...music interlude...)

lie to me
give me something worth living for
tell me a reason worth fighting for (fighting for)
give me anything (anything)
anything to keep me breathing
lie to me
give me something worth living for
tell me a reason worth dying for (dying for)
give me anything (anything)
anything to keep me breathing

(...music interlude...)

anything to keep me breathing
anything to keep me breathing

Woke up at 7 today in the morning. because mum has to go pontian with grandma and uncle about a farm thingy at kampung.

Haiz left the family alone as she did not cook anithing just to have survive no problem for me. School start at 1 today and i'm freaking bored with nothing to do early in the morning!!! AHHHHH!!!!

Shit!!!! Hahax. Just have to entertain myself then for a few2 hours more to go haiz.

B!!!!My love!!!! U woke up late today for school!!!I called u many times but u didn't pick up the fon and i even msg u still never wake up. I hope u do get a hell of a scolding in school later. I'm worried about u and i miss u dear. See even if we a really far apart lyke from one of singapore to the other i make is like we are really close to each other okie sayang. Do study well for u n this year okies love. I'm here supporting u with ur every needs. Dan b when want to go park???i want to relief my stress sitting beside u under our tree okie sayang.

ah shit. going school was a waste of time today. learn nothing new and hasn't done any work because in the morning teacher never come and i ran away from fire drill in school as i sat outside school during the fire drill and in the afternoon our teacher was busy with the raft thingy again we never have class again. wat a waste of time going school as i could use up my time sitting at home or sleeping today haiz damn angry.!!!!

Wee i'm really proud of myself yeah yeah. I'm proud because my teacher said to me just now that he saw alot of improvement in me.

I did most of my work nowadays, come to school early and try to help others do their work.

At first i didn't lyke the course at all but after a year plus learning, i started to show some interest in school now.

I'm really proud of myself all thanks to my sayang. Sayang i wanna say thank you for giving the motivation to study well. U gave me hope to everything i do now.

We been through alot right sayang. Lets us put the bad things in the past behind and only remember the good things. We start anew and afresh ok sayang. If u want anything just tell me but just don't make me mad and angry at u okie love. U don't want to see me angry anymore.
I just want u to be and not being stress okies sayang. Don't be afraid about me getting scolded if i'm late sending u home or anything. I sacrifice my time or anything just to see a smile on ur cute face. Ur happiness is the key to my happiness. I sincerely and deeply love u you my darling. U're my everything. Muacks my love!!! and syang please don't hurt me anymore i can't stand living without u by myside. even for a second.

Why is this happen to me i'm freaking lost. What happening to me!!!

I need some fucking help from anyone or anything.

No longer being myself after a few day. Been quiet and keeping to myself. Just need to get back to the right road in lyfe. Have lost hope in doing everything in lyfe.

Will die digging my own grave. Flying in my lyfe with broken wings. Left shattered in everything that happens to me.
remember this things??? i kept them in a safe place in my room and in my heart.

nobody knows where i kept them.

I always check on them a few times just to make sure they're there.

If you could just remember the days, the times and everything we did together. It was very memorial.

the letters you wrote a full of feelings and meanings and i appreciate it very much.

many thanks for being there when i need you to talk to, to express my feelings, my problems, my everything. Thanks alot.

this song is from me to you.


(Verse 1)
Ooooohhh yea ooooh yea
If the heart is always searching,
Can you ever find a home?
I've been looking for that someone,
I'll never make it on my own.
Dreams can't take the place of loving you,
There's gotta be a million reasons why it's true.

When you look me in the eyes,
And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When you're right here by my side.
When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
I find my paradise,
When you look me in the eyes.

How long will I be waiting,
To be with you again?
Gonna tell you that I love you,
In the best way that I can.
I can't take a day without you here,
You're the light that makes my darkness disappear.

When you look me in the eyes,
And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When you're right here by my side.
When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
I find my paradise,
When you look me in the eyes.

More and more, I start to realize,
I can reach my tomorrow,
I can hold my head up high,
And it's all because you're by my side.

When you look me in the eyes,
And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When your right here by my side,
When I hold you my arms,
I know that it's forever,
I just gotta let you know,
I never wanna let you go.

When you look me in the eyes.

And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When you're right here by my side.
When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
I find my paradise,
When you look me in the eyes.

Wah finally got home after a very tiring and sleepy day. Went to school early for nothing shit the p.e teacher did not come down. Shit la if no p.e at least tell la so don't need to waste anytime going to school early haiz shit. Lucky the gang came so have some people to hang with other than sharul. If you got anything just don't keep quite to urself k. We are all friends join us hanging out in the canteen or outside school at the shelter rather than you keep sitting alone to one side. Like a person with depression. And thafsir thinks you have menses for a guy???hmm how ehk hahax. Well finish school today at 12.

Message my love went i finish school and last minute she wanted to meet so have to change bus half way to get to the interchange. Was suppose to work today but called the shop and told that i got something on and i can't come today. Lucky maggie was in a good mood today and she didn't scold me weee lucky me.

Went to the toilet at the interchange on the second last cubicle because wanted to take out my p.e shorts as it was not comfortable walking around. Was surprise that somebody wrote a story about a gay having sex in the toilet. Well it was a nice story anyways.

Reach paris today around 1 plus. Haiz hope she didn't wait long for me hehe. As i really really miss her so so so much!!!Finally meet her weee. Hahaz. At first we went to central to buy some food items and drinks and then we proceed to our usual place at the void deck at sat there for 3 hours laughing talking and enjoying our times together. We managed to examine a grasshopper using the sweettalk cup and added some leaves in for it natural habitat hahaz.

Well her mom called so we went home after that.

Love thanks alot for everything okies sayang. I love u very the very much!!!! muuuuuaaaaaaaaaaaacccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkksssssssssssssssss!!!!!

Yeah today got my hair cut hehe yeah yeah. Just got a trim to make my hair thinner. Got layered. Paid 9 dollars just for a layered hair haiz but it was worth it. I lyke it hehe. But have to wait about 5-10mins just to get my hair cut. Well what to do right. Today school started late at 1 so have enough time. Actually today i finish at 4.30 but i didn't go to the 2nd class so i got home from school at 3 today hahaz. Well tomorrow is another day at school haiz. Gotta to enjoy school. Thats all for today.

Well been quite awhile since type sumthing new. Haiz. Well been tired after school or my sis just kept using the computer for the whole day thats all. Well been enjoying school very much this week. Another 3 more weeks for me and it is the holidays again. Been hanging around in school with the rest of the gang lately for no reason. Just feel fun hanging out with them, laughing at others for no reason and just enjoy talking. Haiz. After this final year not sure on meeting them or not as we're going our ways after the final exam. But must still stay in contacts okies guys.

Well actually writing this about yesterday but yesterday was too tired to play the compt so just went home and shower then sleep. Haiz went to lau pa sat around 4 plus reach there will the whole family. The last time i went there was last year during my b'dae wit my buddies weeee. Well we ate satay, chicken wings, crab, crayfish, lala, gon gon, stingray and kai lan. Ate alot till became very sleepy. After that we when to vivocity just to walk around and relex our minds. Enjoyed yesterday very2 much. At lau pa sat saw my old fwen from ite which has quited school last year. We just shake hands for awhile and just talk about somethings. He has gotten bigger in size. Haiz what has happen to him since he quit school.

woke up to a saturday morning with my whole body in cramp. Just because of exercising yesterday at the freaking gym in school. Shit my shoulders are in pain. Well father plans on going out to eat today in the mid afternoon. Been a long time since the whole family went out to eat together. Gonna have some bonding time together today. weeeee. HAHAHAX. Well it is a way to relex myself. Haiz. Well thats all for today just a nice simple and short post.

Just got home from a tiring day at school today. Haiz. Went for p.e today. After a few months of not exercising it just feel so different but nice. Ran 3 rounds at the track today. Was suppose to run 5 rounds but most of us were tired so we gave up and the teacher gave a chance for us. Then we went to the gym today. My first tyme going to the gym weeee. I learn how to operate the exercise machine so now i know. I plan on going to the gym now and then so i could stay fit and i could pump up muscle to make me little bit bigger hahax. But was suppose to work later at 3. Haiz being tired lyke this just have to drag myself to work today. Gonna work with sir david today because it is going to be his last day and he is going to get a transfer to plaza by the park. Shit that far. But i think it is better for him. Gd Luck Sir!!! Okie then gonna get ready for work now haiz...

Haiz got home around 4 today. Been tired working on labour day. Last year on labour day not people came so the shop wasn't busy but today was different. Heard many things from those aunties today. They said on july the shop is going to close. Easily said the whole entertainment is going to close down because of renovation. But not sure when it will close. Haiz got me thinking the whole day at work on where i should work next. In my head there is two places. One is McCafe at jurong point because my fwen at work said her sister work there so she wanna recommend me and it is nearer to my house and the next place is sakura the international buffet eating place located at the new stadium.

Wanna try there because just a few stops away from my house and i could ask hakim to transfer there so i got a fwen working there and could learn from him as he is a senior to sakura already. Haiz just 2 more months of working there.

Planning on making a party for the shop. Thinking about inviting the old managers, the old staff which work there before so we could make it a memorial closing for the shop. It will be a sad time for me when the shop close. Memories were there after 1 year plus working there and my first ever working place. Haiz....gonna be sad...damn sad....